The end is the beginning in this story to tell of a Laura
and her journey through an inferno and dark hell.
In a puddle of her own ruby blood, she lies and waits,
grasping a photo of her friends, the Mary Kates.
Now the Mary Kates were not alive or even in existence.
Rather, they were an idea from the boyfriend that was implanted with
perseverance and consistence.
One day in early fall, he gave Laura this lie so she could
feel grand and ever so tall.
He did so innocently and with no ill intent. After all, there was no way of predicting
that Laura would begin that hellish decent.
The Mary Kates began as small and weak thoughts, but after
some time, they turned into demons that Laura battled and poorly fought.
As a little girl she was different but not abnormal or
strange nor even a child that her parents corrupted or changed.
It wasn’t until the Mary Kate’s occupied and consumed her
mind that she obsessed and grew evil over the days and in such a short time.
For her, they were enticing and glamorous to behold, and she
would tell the boyfriend of the stories to her they told.
It was not long for him to realize that he was the culprit
and that he was wrong and that the Mary Kates in Laura’s life didn’t belong.
The Mary Kates were meant to enhance Laura’s beauty and
special worth but backfired and eventually put her into the ground and dirt.
No matter how many times the boyfriend is told he shouldn’t
blame himself, he can’t help but grieve and stagnate away on a dusty, black
shelf.
As Laura occupied her mind with the single idea of the Mary
Kates, she, with regret and pain, filled her smooth and white slate.
The day finally came for Laura to wither and die. It was inevitable and many still rue it as
the weep and cry.
In the end, a photo was all she had to transition her into
the next life as she ended it all with her own blade and with her own knife.
The tragedy didn’t begin as dramatic nor obvious as it
turned out to be. It was just a simple
obsession that turned into death and selfish greed.
The beginning has become the end in this story that I’ve
told with a principle that has existed from the days of old.
-Mikey D. B.-
Someone
once said that we all must suffer from one of two pains: the pain of discipline
or the pain of regret. Awhile back I
wrote about the correlation between Alexander Pope and the Darth Vader himself
and how the significance of an event is determined by the individual’s
reality. You know, the whole child
treating you like the bombing Japanese thing just because you stole their toy
or what not? Some major life changes
have been occurring in my life and it has gotten me thinking about this concept:
the expansion of a world or the perspective of the world expanding. I’ve noticed that our perspectives and perceptions
do not grow unless they are forced to by change in whatever form and when they
don’t change, that’s when things get messy.
The general
definition or idea of insanity is this: trying the same thing over and over
again, but expecting different results each and every time we try it. This kind of relates to the whole Solomon’s Kryptonite thing I wrote about
and how we think that we can beat the odds.
We all think that we have the answer to the universe. However, instead on the large scale of history
and not learning from our ancestor’s mistakes, insanity is when we don’t learn
from our own mistakes and is on a much more personal scale. Sometimes we hold onto an idea, grasping onto
the fact that it could change our life and change our perspective that we fail
to realize how corrupt the idea really is. “Like thieves in the night, unwelcome thoughts
can and do seek entrance into our minds.
But we do not have to throw open the door, serve them tea and crumpets,
and then tell them where the silverware is kept! Throw the rascals out!” (Jeffery
R. Holland, General Conference of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day
Saints April 2011). There’s nothing wrong with having a bad idea
or thought, for it is only human and that’s how we learn, but when we hold onto
or obsess over the unwelcome thoughts, that is when we have become insane. We all have a hard time letting go at one
point or another because we are scared to.
We’ve held onto that thing for so long we are scared to find out what
will happen if we do end up letting go, therefore going insane because we are
trying the same thing over and over again but hoping for a different result.
I have a
friend that said how “fear comes from two main sources: one is the lack of
control and two, facing the unknown”.
Our lives are focused on different things at various times of our
lives. Sometimes those things are good
and wholesome and others, well…they’re not so good and not so wholesome. Like the earth revolving around the sun, our
personal worlds revolve around things that can either possess or accent the
thoughts in our minds and the ideas we have been fed. When a comet or asteroid or change enters our
orbit, naturally we feel fear. We fear
from not only the lack of control we have over the asteroid, but we also fear
because we do not know exactly what the impact will be like. Despite all of our scientific research, we
cannot predict the fallout.
Recently, I
have adopted the saying, “When you’re rich, spending money is fun. When you’re poor, spending money is an
adventure.” When all is said and done,
the fallout is what makes life an adventure.
It’s grabbing life by the horns and not knowing whether or not you’ll be
tossed around or if you will be the one doing the tossing. It’s constantly changing and redefining your
future and trying new things in the process.
Life is finding the balance of thoughts, ideas, actions, and werds. It is suffering from the pain of discipline
or suffering from the pain of regret.